all unpleasant

Renegade Survivalists v. Stranger Beating

in
“You’re kidnapped by a renegade survivalist group and transported to the middle of the desert in Utah. By and large they stay in their own compound and prepare for nuclear destruction. Quality of life is decent, grow/ raise their own food, responsible for their own water and electricity, slow internet hookup though. They also take hardcore drugs and then all sleep amongst each other (60/40 ratio men to women roughly). They give you two options. Stay and live with them for 10 years. Or. They present a chained up guy to you, who you have to just beat the shit out of. You don’t know if he did anything wrong to them, or anyone. Maybe, maybe not, he could just be some guy. If you choose to beat the shit out of him, they’ll let you go. What do you do?”
— Mikey

I'd beat the shit out of the guy and feel no remorse.  The crazies are responsible for the guy's wrongful or maybe rightful imprisonment and subsequent beating, not me.  Plus I have confidence I could avoid most really long term damage.

On the other hand the life in the Utah desert doesn't sound unbearable, but ten years is way too long to burn.  I could just skip the drugs, but a lot of burdens would soon fall on me as the most responsible cultist.

Fallout v. Deadspace

in
“You have to chose between living in these two bad video game universes: 8 years in Fallout 3 or 24 hours in that game you wanted to play me to play with the lights out (forgot it’s name, but it is basically Event Horizon with more aliens in video game form.) What do you choose?”
— Mikey
Fallout v Deadspace PCv.jpg

I'm making a few assumptions in my answer that I think you'll find acceptable.  1) I'm assuming that second game is Deadspace, grotesque alien horror, really violent.  Yeah.  2) I'm assuming that this is a no extra-life no save and replay situation.  I die, i die.  3) I'm assuming that this is a real life representation of these worlds.  Living in them as if they were reality as the developers imagined them.

That said, 24 hours in Deadspace.  I'll take my chances.  And let me be clear, my chances of survival are next to nothing, but if I do survive my necromorph disaster, there are parts of the Deadspace universe where life continues essentially normally.  Even a high-tech enjoyable life of luxury in a futuristic society.  Those are not the experiences of protagonist Isaac Clark, but I could hope that I could maneuver my way around the terrifying man-hunting alien virus and evil cultists and find a spaceship to something better.  If not, 24 hours might be plausible to wait it out.

It would be far easier to survive the Fallout universe but less enjoyable to do so and not for eight fucking years.  Christ, it's still a total post-apocalyptic wasteland infested with radioactive scorpions the size of buses, fire breathing ants, mutants who carry sledgehammers and say things like, "I will wear your bones around my neck," and cannibals.  Something would get me eventually.  And even if it didn't, life for those years would be terrible.

Plus the girls in the Deadspace universe seem more attractive.  Well... at least until they sprout an extra row of teeth and tentacular razor swords from their shoulder blades.

Writing v. Tebow

in
“You learn you could make it as a writer for as long as you’d like, but only if you write about Tim Tebow. It can be an extensive series, but Tim Tebow has to be a very prominent character in every story. Do you do it?”
— Mikey
Tebow v Writing PCV.jpg

No.  That's a sad thought.  I'd choose to do something else with my life.  Tim Tebow just isn't that interesting.  Even the Tebow phenomena isn't that interesting anymore.

Game of Thrones Spoilers v. Banned Books

in
“Would you rather learn about what’s been happening on the Game of Thrones show, or lead an effort to ban specific books that you don’t like?”
Game of Thrones Spoilers v Banned Books PCV.jpg

I'd rather learn what's happening on Game of Thrones.  This demonstrates my selfless nature.  It'd be worse for me personally, but no books should be banned.  Who am I, who is anyone, to say books shouldn't be read, even ones I don't like.  Especially ones I don't like.  The number of people in power who've damaged the world because they wanted to stop other people from engaging with something they personally don't approve of is innumerable.  The instinct to control others instead of letting them control themselves is the worst of human instincts.  And the wise have learned that tremendous value can be gained from the thoughts and stories of those with whom you generally dislike and disagree.

NCAA Shill v. Homoeroticism

in
“You must choose between the following: you become a paid shill for the NCAA. This means that you have to travel the country promoting NCAA policies and vouch for its usefulness and mission. This includes going on TV for panel shows and interviews in addition to giving presentations at conferences and universities. You are away from home 3-4 out of 5 work days and you are paid $70,000 a year after taxes. Your other option is that you have to have balls in your face for 3 minutes in a row, once a month for a full year. You don’t get to choose when this happens. Which do you choose?”
— Mikey
NCAA Shill v. Homoeroticism.jpg

I choose balls in face.  That's not a thousandth as gross as being a relatively low paid shill for the NCAA.  Plus, the job takes me away from Maisy a lot.  Even more horrifying.  NCAA has policies I don't believe in and I think are bad for millions of people.  It's very hard to get me to compromise my ethics.  I'd rather be in the Dark Knight Rises prison again.

Golovkin v. Hashtags

in
“Would you rather...fight Gennady Golovkin, who is 28-0 with 25 knockouts in a 3 round fight.  Or: Make sure you use hashtag in every conversation you have at least once. As in “Hi mom, how are you doing? hashtag good morning.” You have to do this for a year.”
— Mikey

I admit you have me conflicted with this one.  The option I'm not considering at all is actually going a year having conversations with people where I constantly use the term hashtag.  So effectively you've given me the option of having a very dangerous but very short battle with a professional puncher, or take a vow of silence for a year.  Much as I think I could survive the Golovkin encounter, I feel the vow of silence is more me.  Plus if I needed to speak, then I could always say something like, "Take me to the hospital!  Hashtag emergency" which I would avoid as much as possible.  Should I fail to keep my vow of silence- hashtag shame.